Thursday, November 7, 2013

Rob Ford: The Lawlz Are Over

(via National Post)
Editor's Note: Wrote this Tuesday and wasn't home to post this on Wednesday so I missed out on mentioning the forever trolling Iron Shiek calling out the mayor and the most recent footage that came out today.  

Mayor Rob Ford has admitted to smoking crack.  He was on one of his drunken stupors sometime last year he believes he smoked it.  The city of Toronto is now a talking point for news outlets, daytime talk television, late night TV and the butt of a lot of lame crack puns.  As someone who "had his back" through most of this, I want to say this:  I don't really care that much at this point because everyone else is laughing.  Care as in feel heartfelt or heartbroken that he admitted to smoking crack.  I am disappointed I can't laugh at him on purpose anymore.

Around three - four years ago I started reading the news, like actually reading it and keeping up-to-date on it.  And what has always caught my attention, was the scandals or tragedies.  The earthquake in Japan was one of the stories I really remember, I had the Huffington Post tab open at all times when that story broke.  I was just invested in it.  Since then the scandals and outrageous news headlines have always caught my eye, I'm sure if Olivia Pope was a real person I'd be reading on her on the daily until the news reporters decided to move on.  I've read about the Zumba instructor who was hoeing out of her studio in Maine, the Casey Anthony case, the Christopher Dorner story, Bob Filner the San Diego mayor who was making passes at any woman in a skirt no matter what age in the summer.  The scandals are just more exciting and more interesting then city planning or whose injured on Maple Leafs or what charity run is happening on the weekend in Toronto.  The same way your boyfriend likes the car crashes in NASCAR or the way your girlfriend tunes in every week to watch real housewives, I am the same about how sex, lies and drugs tie into a news story in a US state.  The more outrageous the better, that's why I follow Florida Man on Twitter.

Now, Rob Ford.  I loved me some Rob Ford, mainly because he was rotund, had the voice of a cartoon character and kept falling or walking into things like he was on the set of SNL.  That's the thing about Ford, he kept me entertained.  I was in it for the lawlz.  I didn't care if people liked him or not, I liked him.  Whether it was failing to lose weight in that cut weight challenge last year, walking into a cameraman, the inability to hike a football, messing up announcing Toronto is hosting the NBA All Star game, walking the streets drunk or beating Hulk Hogan in an arm wrestling match (if you know wrestling, you know Hogan ain't taking a dive for anyone).  But the laughs soon stopped once Gawker announce they're in contact with someone who says they have video of Ford smoking crack cocaine.

Now in this day and age, crack cocaine is a no-no.  It's always been a no-no but it's never been the drug for recreational use.  It's more for profit (listen to any New York rapper for an example).  Can you imagine, if it was marijuana he was smoking?  Could you imagine?  Most people would think he's a pretty good guy, I'm on social media quite a lot, I'm quite aware of the popularization of weed in the past few years.  There's a number of people who are pro-marijuana in this city, they would probable shrug at the thought of him smoking green.  But it's crack.  That's not cool.  The people are asking for him to resign and he's been evading the media for some time, until today.

(via National Post)
"Yes I have smoked crack cocaine."  

Listening to the interview where he admits to once, yes once, smoking crack he sounds defeated.  A man that has been caught and a man that is tired.  Tired of avoiding and ducking these accusations for a long time.  It's almost similar to when Bunny Colvin had to own up to his mistakes in The Wire.  It's no longer "look at the fat man stumble and fumble around this supposed crack video", it's "this man may have a problem".  Not a crack problem but maybe a drinking problem.  "On one of my drunken stupors", I don't mind a few drinks once in awhile but when you're in office, political office, you gotta control yourself.  I've never even heard of the word stupor until today.  We've already seen him walk home drunk, we don't really need him signing policies or bills while intoxicated.  Ford has to step back and see the bigger picture because the lawlz are over.

No one wants to bring up his approval rating, which was getting higher when word first broke out about the videotape.  He's drawn up plans for a better way to get home from Kennedy station instead of going through that loud Scarborough RT line and he's lowered property tax.  Nope, he's smoked crack says one person.  He's a crackhead says another.  He's fat, silly, does things that makes me laugh and occasionally does something good for the city.  But for now, whether or not he still has control after this week, he's just a political figure whose done crack.  Even if he did it once or if he's full time user, it doesn't make a difference.  

It's no longer fun.  The memes and the Chris Farley jokes have begun. The mystery and speculation is gone.  If the tape was actually him smoking weed or chewing peyote, the general reaction from people would've altered drastically.  There would be acceptance if he smoked weed, he'd be compared to Phil Jackson if it was peyote.  The possibilities!  But nope, he admitted to smoking crack out of a pipe, unless he did that wrong (even Marion Berry "didn't know" how to use it in that video).  Am I still entertained?  I did get a chuckle when he said "I didn't lie, you didn't ask the right question" and he did wear a NFL tie to the press conference.  He somehow finds a way to keep me chuckling through his worst moment in his tenure.