Saturday, September 22, 2012

One Man Mission: Going Out Dolo

do-lo [dōlō]
  1. Alone. Solo, for self.
  2. Doing shit by yourself.

It’s Friday night, you just got paid and you’re listening to that 80’s song with the mulatto whose braids look like yarn.  And you want to go out.  You call your boys /girls/people to see what they’re up to for that night.  No one wants to go out, either they had a long day, they’re broke or just don’t want to go out.  Now what?  You still have the urge to drink, dance, or get ratchet as the kids say.  Do you go dolo?  All you really want to do is have fun, are mutual others needed for you to have fun or do they hinder the experience or even cause damage to you having fun?  The thought of going to a bar or club where you know it’s going to be a packed house by yourself seems unrealistic or taboo today.  But there are advantages to going out on your own.

“So what you do last night?”
“Went to Rockwood”
“Oh you and your boys?”
“Nah just me”
“Really?  You went by yourself?  Why?”

With a club packed full of people, you can snake your way through the crowd unlike those groups that looks like a congo line is headed toward the bar.  At bars, you and your party need a table together and when its packed tables and booths for four or more go quick but when you’re solo there’s always the small two seater tables or just pull up a bar stool at the bar.  With going dolo, you don’t have to worry about leaving early because your one friend isn’t feeling the atmosphere (or just be a spoil sport) or in the words of Dom Mazzetti “their motherly instincts kick in and everybody’s sober again” because that one friend got too sloppy. 
If you know how to have fun and are filled with energy like Redbull then you can carry that energy onto others and you should be able to enjoy yourself.  Not saying you’re going to have a montage of chatting it up with strangers, taking shots, dancing with beautiful women and walking out with the owner having laughs and giggles but it would at least mirror part of the first three.  Sidenote: beautiful women aren’t single anymore, they’re taken or married or having kids or pregnant.  So why are you beautiful and pregnant trying to get in a club?  The bouncers should shush you away like Craig Robinson in Knocked Up. 
Bars are different.  It's mostly bros and couples that go if there's a game or fight that's happening.  If you’re trying to rev up the bar for the up-and-coming fight, stop.  You’ll just look douchy.  Sit down, enjoy your drink, you can cheer and clap but do it with regards to those trying to avoid the douche at the bar.

“This bro is clapping why too hard.  You’re not in his corner bro, shut up!” 

This past summer, I saw The Dark Knight Rises by myself.  Now this is Batman, I didn’t really care who I was going with but I was gonna see the last of the Nolan trilogy that Saturday at that time.  And you know what?  I enjoyed it.  (DKR plot holes aside) I really enjoyed seeing a movie by myself in a crowded theatre.  Without having to wait for anyone, you can buy your snacks ahead of time, don’t have to tell folks you’re saving a seat for anyone, you just sit down, eat your popcorn and wait for the movie to start.  Sidenote: only thing I buy from theatres is the ticket.  Don’t get me started on snack prices, $4 for some twizzlers ta loco FOUR DOLLARS!  Now a movie has different implications, no one wants to hear anything but the movie and occassional laughter/screaming, even that can be annoying.  Just sit and be quiet and if the theatre isn't so packed, kick your feet up.
Bar/clubs are different.  You’re socializing, trying to get the bartenders/waiters attention, wondering if that girl/guy at the bar is cute or not and just having fun.  Going by yourself to these places shouldn’t be socially awkward as some make it out to be.  Waiting on people is a bitch especially when you know them.  Now I’m just touching on the routine spots, there’s still concerts, fairs, food festivals, school events, outdoor events, gatherings of Juggalos etc. that have to be explored, you and your friends gonna go or you gonna go dolo?

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