Saturday, May 18, 2013

List: Ranking The Fast & Furious Series

With the up-and-coming addition to the Fast and Furious series on May 24th, let's look back at the series that made car fanatics everywhere rejoice.  Fast and Furious centers around car racing and avoiding being caught by the law and getting lots of money while doing it, thus the car racing skill comes in handy.  That's pretty much sums up the series, I haven't watched the extended trailer for the recent one yet but I'm pretty sure it's more car racing skills used to avoid people for a large amount of money.  This is what I got from the commercials that are airing now: Luke Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) needs Dom (Vin Diesel) and Brian's (Paul Walker) help even though he chased them around Rio in the the fifth installment and there's a tank and Dom drives through the nose of a plane and Tyrese yelling.  Yeah that's all I got.  TO THE RANKING!!

5. Fast & Furious

I honestly don't remember alot from this one except it that this sets up what the rest of the series is going to look like if they decide to make more.  I didn't really enjoy this one, not really memorable and it's last because I'm pretty sure everyone else just remembered this movie as "the one where everyone returns and go to Mexico for something".  And Brian goes on the run with Dom, Pug Rodriguez dies and that's about it.

4. Tokyo Drift

The one that was a cash grab with Dom showing up at the end that had Bow Wow in it.

This wasn't a terrible movie.  This one introduced drifting, which is a driving technique where the driver intentionally oversteers, causing loss of traction in the rear wheels, while maintaining control from entry to exit of a corner.  (Thanks Wikipedia!)  It also introduced Han who is probably the best character that's been introduced that's not the original four.  This was the last installment where street racing was still a main factor, after this it became about drugs and stealing and driving around the world, or something.  And Han dies but returns for the next installment, thank God.

3. 2 Fast 2 Furious

The one where Tyrese's form of yell acting was introduced to the world.

Dom doesn't return for this one because he had to make the memorable A Man Apart where he grows a goatee.  In this one, Brian O'Connor is on the run after letting Dom escape from the police, he ends up getting caught and has to team up with ex convict (of course) Tyrese (it's Roman but he's always Tyrese in every movie he does).  They have to go undercover as street racers to help transport money for a drug lord.  I remember it for being really colourful from the cars to the Miami setting to Eva Mendes.  It also had one of the better soundtrack songs, "Act A Fool", that's still pretty good to this day but then again, why am I listening to Ludacris in 2013?

2. Fast Five

The one where everyone returns, again, with Dwayne Johnson.

This one was surprisingly good.  Like I had little to no reason to pay this because let's be honest here, there isn't too many movies that can have four sequels and it's still good in quality.  Harry Potter can't still be that great after those kids went through puberty can it?  Much of the same plot from the previous ones: drugs, police, racing, money and Tyrese yelling.  There's a whole lot of "Holy Shit!" moments in this one.  From the beginning train heist scene, Dom vs. Hobbs, the chick from the fourth one in a bikini, the ambush scene and that bank vault destroying the streets of Brazil.  It was a pretty damn good movie.  It ending with them escaping, of course, which sets up the next one Fast 6, but at what point do you say: Okay, enough's enough.  There's already another one in-store with Dwayne Johnson returning and people are still paying to see this. So after Fast 6 will you be lining up to see Fast 7 or Fast Figure 8 or Fast 9: Even More Horsepower or Fast 10: Yep We're Still Driving Around Causing Trouble?

1. The Fast and The Furious

The original one.

Fast & Furious is Point Break with cars.  Brian O'Connor is an undercover cop who infiltrates the underground culture of street racing.  He meets Dom, takes interest in his sister, street racing, the retarded kid gets shot, Asians and the race.  The race that made the series, Dom vs. Brian in a drag race across the train tracks.  It's first because I saw no faults with this one, no it wasn't the greatest movie but it set up one of the top selling movie franchises that has nothing to do with witches, vampires or super heroes.

Editor's Note: (Really me, cause no one else reads this but me) I'm lowkey disappointed that Paul Walker doesn't get more roles.  I swear he doesn't in anything that's not gone straight-to-DVD.  Bobby Z and Running Scared were great movies but went straight-to-DVD so they didn't get noticed.  That's why I'm kinda glad he's going to be starring in Brick Mansions, which would be an awesome name.  It's a remake of the french movie District B13, sure he's an undercover cop, again but it's a role that's doesn't involve car racing.

And Takers was a "so bad it's good" movie.

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